Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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What do you call Eric Torres A furnace magnet

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

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What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

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this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

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What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

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a jew walks out of a furnace

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Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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What's brown? My toilet hahaha

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson. I spelled "red" wrong.

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what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

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I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

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"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

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women's rights

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what do you say to someone acting like an idiot? hey, if you keep acting like an idiot im gunna hit you with a freakin bat , you stupid fubu!

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

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What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

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Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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