Roses are red Violets are blue Your whole family is dead And now it's time for you!

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

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A guy said a racist joke and he got beat up now he is in the hospital for what he said.

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Why are black people faster than white people? They are descended from a lineage where athleticism was more greatly selected for in the evolutionary process.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you call a mexican riding a bike? A cyclist.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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How many beavers can you fit in one paddling pool? None; it's probably very dangerous trying

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog Woof.

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Why do Kenyans run so much? Because they like it.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Roses are red Violets are blue we're going to have sex because i'm stronger than you

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did the vagina smell so bad? Because it had yeast infection.

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A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

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...this makes a cop throw a car and then call "inception!"

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What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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