Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says "Is it hot in here?" The other muffin says "Yes. It feels like 425 degrees."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down -9

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

thumb_up thumb_down -24

how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

thumb_up thumb_down -32

jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

thumb_up thumb_down

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the girl fall off the swing? You've already seen this joke at least SIXTY TIMES on this website, so you already know.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

ding dong thats right no knock on door anymore

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do u say when u see your tv floating in the middle of the night? drop it n*****

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: A blonde walks into a bar. What does she get? A: An icepack.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops