What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what do you tell a woman with one black eye? "sorry about that wild ball, you played a fantastic softball game otherwise"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

thumb_up thumb_down +20

i like my women like i like my coffee without a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because animals walking across a paved street is a very common occurrence ever since the industrialization of the modern world.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the unicorn say when he was kicked out of the grocery store? Nothing, dodo birds dont exist

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happends to a monkey without arms.. He bleeds..

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock knock What?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Politics.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops