What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Food and blankets from a nearby shelter.

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Robin, get in the car.

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

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Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers, Delphiniums are also blue.

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3 women are on a plane. One blonde, one brunnete, and the other a red head. The pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. The 3 women find out that there is only one parachute in the plane. The plane crashes and they all die.

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True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench. The bucket.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? this overused joke

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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