- Anti Joke

How are cars made? By magic.

Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

The sentence below is an anti-joke.

Now this bible thing, is a real anti joke so get ready to have your faith tested, and overcome it: There was that story where God charged against an army at the top of some mountains, the army is told to have been led with God personally at the front rank right? But they lost because the enemy had horse wagons (you know what I mean) made of steel or iron, (does not matter what it is if you ask yourself really) I mean even if it was Metatron, he would have had uh... Wings or something to even the odds, Maybe God is like Raiden from Mortal Kombat, he needs to become a Mortal in order to enter fights on earth... MORTAL KOMBAAAT! I mean God made humans humans made Sin (gotta say we get the blame for a lot of shit others did, I hate apples and cant even stand the smell of them for once, never ate one)

What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? nothing he ain't already told her twice....

What did the fat girl say to the good looking guy? Nothing. She didn't have the self-confidence to go up to him.

Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is a real guy. Sorry kids.

What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

Q:Why was the frog sad A:He was stapeld to a boys face.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog Woof.

U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

What did the man with scissors do? He cut his balls off.

Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

How did the blind dyslexic boy find his way out of the cornfield? -He drew backwords numbers and letters in the dirt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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