whats green and walks? A cabbage, cabbages dont walk

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sickman Fraud, cocaine snorting alshole... "Oh yeah mommy I love raping you so much... What where are you? This cocaine is really bad quality man! The effect was so short..." Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: "Because since when do you really need cocaine... ...In order to rape your mother?"

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call a barrel full of monkeys? A game, you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

George: I see you got a haircut. Jim: No, I got them all cut.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Four black guys have a picnic. One of them pulls out a bag of KFC. Another pulls out some Kool Aid. The third pulls out a watermelon. The fourth pulls out a box of cookies you racist prick

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did sally fall of the swing? She had no arms or legs Knock knock who's there? Not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: WHY DID GOD MAKE ASIANS? A: NO FREIKEN IDEA

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you confuse and idiot? Purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a baseball player on the Yankees, and one on the Red Sox? One was named Jeff, the other wasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops