what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

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Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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Yo Momma so fat, that the doctor prescribed her prescription drugs that deal with her eating disorder and recommended that she begin a low calorie diet and live a more active lifestyle.

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Once upon a time, there was a ghost. The ghost was sneaking up on a little girl when she turned around and asked the ghost "Are you a stalker or something?" The ghost, unable to reply (being a ghost) was then kicked in the shins. The End!

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

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No, I still have to make sense of some facts bits and pieces here, and thinking is pretty much the only thing I can do at this moment, so why would my doppelganger wannabe call me from her mothers place?

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

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Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

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Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

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A Canadian man, American man and French man all go to a wive swapping party. The Canadian gets the American's wife, the American gets the French wife, and the Frenchman dies of a brain aneurism and the European wife. is very disappointed in her night.

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So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

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WNBA

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Whats big, round, and full of helium? Michaels Balloon head!

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SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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