What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

What do you call a black man jumping off a bridge? Suicide.

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

Why did Hunter cross the road? No one cares, unless he gets hit.

Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a psychopath, that's why.

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

melon

What do you get when you cross a horse and a donkey? a mule

Why was 8 afraid of 9? Because 9 bullied him until he became anorexic.

What did Reed read? A. Read?

You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

The 80's

Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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