How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

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A man forgets to hang his food in a tree on a camping trip. A bear comes and kills his wife and two kids but leaves the man to live with the guilt for the rest of his life.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

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You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

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javascript:alert("your own");

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

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Why didn't Erick have a party last week? Because his grandma died

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Q. What's rare, horny, and a myth towards most guys who have never seen one? A. A Unicorn.

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Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

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A man walks into a bra. Bra kills him...

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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