How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

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What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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Hitler is my role model

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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What do you call an unexpected pregnancy? A defective condom.

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Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

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What do you call a baby impaled on a stick? Lunch.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

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What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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hey

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welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

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why did the boy cry because i punched him so hard in the face he shit out his teeth for the next three weeks

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your mom is so dumb she threw a rock at the ground and missed

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The WNBA is on the cooking channel

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save water shower with friends

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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