Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

Knock knock Who's there? I eat myp.

A chinese man walks into a bar, and he see's his friends they are black, mexican, white, and paki. This is their meeting place for their group on racial equality.

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

12

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

What did the father say to his daughter? "I'm going to rape you."

The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

im telling maguire

Q: How do you win the tour defrance if you have one nut? A: Hard work and dedication.

You're on fire.

why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

Tyler is a downer and is always negative to everybody

First person: Knock, knock. Second person: Who's there? First person: You know. Second person: 'You know' who? First person: O.O LORD VOLDEMORT!

how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

A Irish man walks our of a bar

Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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