I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

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Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

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A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

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I like dogs. Lots of dogs. Meow.

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What's yellow and goes up and down? A banana in an elevator.

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What does the fox say? "It's called a hustle, sweetheart."

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A. Where was Sally during the boston marathon bombing? Q. Everywhere. www.facebook.com/wowedgy

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What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig? A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. Knock Knock Who? Knock Knock (:

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knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Wayne Gacy.

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I got shot once it hurt a lot

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What is red and itchy? Something that itches and it turns red if you itch it to much

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. Everyone shoots her.

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Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

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Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

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is this the krusty krab? no this is smooth lobster.

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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Why did the man fall from the sky? Because he was dead.

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Q

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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What's brown and sticky? Poo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops