What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

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Mum: Black or white iPod? Her Son: Black Please, it'll run faster.

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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Does pizza sound good for dinner?

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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A blond walks into a hair dresser's wearing a pair of headphones. The hair dresser tells the blond to take the headphones off so she can cut the blond's hair. The blond says that if they take off the headphones, then they'll die. The hair dresser works around the headphones, but finally needs to cut underneath the headphones. The hair dresser forces the blond to take the headphones off and nothing happened.

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What did the bacon say to Sam's eggs? Why are you green?

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Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

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sarah taylor

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Hi my name is Lisa Hi Lisa my name is Karen. Nice to meet Karen Likewise...

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Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

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Roses are red violets are blue if you were number one I"ll pick number two, if you were number two then I'll pick POO!

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why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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