whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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Q: How do you get a jewish girls number? A: You roll up her sleeve

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What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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How did the mecanic die? He drowned

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andrew wagner

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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How did the girl die? 25.

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

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I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

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Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

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A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

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my namew is jd

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golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

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Why is Timmy a dumbass ? He's not, because asses cannot, by definition, be intelligent, so it is unnecessary to qualify it as "dumb".

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Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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