Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

A Chinese man fails a math test

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

womans having rights.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

Q:how do you save a black guy from drowning A: you shoot him

Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

A muslim paints Mohammed

Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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