knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

question: do zombies eat brains answer: actually zombies don't exist, so they don't eat anything

what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

What do you call a dead, black child? Dead.

Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

Why did annie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Annie!

so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

What is hotter than a lightbulb. The Sun.

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

Why are trees green? I have no idea

What did the farmer say when he couldnt find his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

whats wors than getting hit by a car? getting raped by a giant scorpian

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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