I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

What is a dog's favorite color? Dogs are colorblind and can not see colors.

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure _._._

How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

They say Jesus Christ walked on water and that humans are made up of 70% water...... So if I walk on babies, am I 70% Jesus?

Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

look left now look right. washing machine

What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

Q: How do you scream at a purple? A: Black people

A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

Do you know what God said to Hitler as he approached the gate of heaven? ??????????????????

.....Carrot Top....

How many of my Dad's "fishing buddies" have gone down to the basement for a "meeting", but never returned? 37 so far. I'm concerned. I seriously have never seen my dad fish. Pretty sure he doesn't own a fishing pole.

Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

one of the idiot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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