What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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A man in a restaurant says "Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter apologizes and offers to comp the meal.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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wanna hear a joke. i do to

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y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

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What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

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A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

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knock knock. Who's there? The delivery man.

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I would like a pint of..........beer." The bar tender asked "why the long pause?" The bear replies "I think I just had a stroke."

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

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What did the black kid down the road get for Christmas? Your Bike.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, and they don't have to be blonde, anyone can screw in a light bulb.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

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Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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