Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock knock! Knock knock!! Knock knock!!! Knock knock!!!! WHOSE THERE! Wait its a woodpecker

thumb_up thumb_down +1

yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

thumb_up thumb_down +4

someone called someone else a frog

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how do you have a great time in a college town you don't

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a joke with no punchline?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the rapist say to the woman? "If you tell anyone I'll kill you!"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A white man walks into a bar. He stabs 4 people and 1 escapes with extremem blood hemorages. his fanily later finds him bleeding on their family car. They take him to the hospital where he is put on life support. Later that night they are told there is nothing the doctors can do and the man slips away in his sleep. Who is to blame? The black guy in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the gay man do last night? Had a curry

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic. And so am I!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops