why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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What did the boy do before school? Jacked off.

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff. What's green and fluffy? Green fluff. What's red and fluffy? A kitten that got hit by a truck.

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Why did the car crash? The driver was female.

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What did the rainbow sun say to the flower-faced elephant? "Want some tea and hamsters?" I'm addicted to acid.

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If Sally has 4 apples and Dan has 3 apples, how many apples do they have together? Red, because ducks have 2 legs.

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What do you call a group of black guys riding on horseback? You don't. You call the cops first.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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A dyslexic walks into a bar. He called it a bra because he was dyslexic and dyslexics misspell things. People laughed at him because mental disabilities are inherently humorous to them.

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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Yo' mama's so black the dark couldn't even see her.

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There was a joke, one sentance, and no punchline.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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