How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to foodstuffs.

Why did the waiter put rubber bands in the soup? Because he wasn't a very good waiter.

What happens when you cross a Kangaroo with an Elephant? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

The Pope, a Rabi and an Islamic religious leader go into a room and come out with what? A new understanding of each others cultures.

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen? Five.

A man in a restaurant says "Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter apologizes and offers to comp the meal.

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? Can you speak up? I cant hear you!

Whats sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going off a cliff? A Caddy fits five.

Conversation: Hey dawg? Whats that? Hey, remember curiosity killed the cat! You threatening me on my life and calling me a pussy? Im calling the cops. ...Because like Larsons some of my ideas suck, but since I am an asshole I also add them to fill some space.

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

How do you make your friends more positive ? Infect them with HIV.

what's retarded and has red hair? You. ;)

whats worst than the holocaust? the holocaust times 2

Spread the net.

What do you call a black guy that drives a plane? A pilot

Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

i cant STAND cripple jokes

what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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