why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Someone stole my cookie from the cookie jar! So I bought another cookie.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call an blank test? an F

thumb_up thumb_down -6

there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +52

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the alcoholic say to his priest? I'm Drunk. The priest says "Your drunk go home". He barely makes it.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

there once was a teacher who wouldnt shut up she just rambled and rambled and rambled ,untill one day i brang a gun to school and shot her ,she doesnt rambled anymore and i dont go to school anymore =win for everyone

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Chuck Norris doesnt need air to live, Air needs chuck Norris to live. Actaully that statment is a fallacy because it would be fatal to not breathe

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops