A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? It doesn't really matter but I wouldn't actually call anything because they have very sensitive hearing and will probably panic and, being blind, might collide with a tree.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

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What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

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What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

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What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

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How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

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why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

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What's the difference between urinating on Lady Gaga and the american flag? It would be wrong to urinate on the American flag.

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How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

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whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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what did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? cancer

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HEY.... HEY YOU..... YEA YOU! IM TALKING TO YOU!!! yolo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops