Andy: Mom, I wish I was a dinosaur. Mom: Aw, that's cute! Why? Andy: Because dinosaurs do not suffer from terminal pancreatic cancer.

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

what's worse than the holocaust? when starbucks puts whip cream in my hot chocolate and I didn't ask for it. created by KA

Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? HIV

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

Why did Mary fall off the swing. She had no arms Knock knock Whis there Not Mary.

Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

What does Harry Potter love? Magic

What did the clitoris say to the labia? I'm from the hood, the clitoral hood.

Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

Why are children like books? They are highly flammable if covered in gasoline.

What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

Your momma is so fat that when she fell over, she couldn't get back up without help, and she probably got several bruises.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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