Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

You dropped something.... Yo lip

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

knock knock. who's there? someone.

Hello

Men's Rights

What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

Why did Julia fall of the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Julia.

1:Nice comeback. 2: If I wanted my cum back, I would get it off your mom's face

Who is Dank? A: Billal

Whats worse than dropping your apple? The Japanese earthquake!

why is my wife crying? because she doesn't like tomatoes

How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

A American, a Brit and a Mexican decided to bet on who could tell the funniest joke. The one that won told a great joke indeed.

Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

Why can't Sally ride a bike? Because Sally's a fish.

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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