Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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You will NEVER guess what just happened!

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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Why did the black man die? Because he fell off a cliff.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

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did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

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Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

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How do you turn a frown upside down? You cannot do such a thing because frowning is the act of sadness. Therefore you cannot nor should not change a persons attitude.

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How are JFK and Jimmy Neutron similar? They both had brain blasts.

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

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What is worse than being blind? Having a brain tumour.

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

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Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

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What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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