*Knock knock* Who's there? No one answers so the man opens the door and gets stabbed 7 times in the chest

one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

What's the difference between a terrorist and Bill Gates? One founded a successful software company, and the other commits mass murder of civilians for political gain.

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

Q: What do a hockey coach and a bar stool have in common? A: because seven ATE nine

What happened to Bilbo? He shit his pants.

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

A guy said a racist joke and he got beat up now he is in the hospital for what he said.

What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

I have an idea! You leave.

Person A "did you hear about the cure for AIDS?" Person B "no." Person A "neither did I."

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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