Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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Q: What's green and goes through walls? A: A pickle, you just have to throw it really hard.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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Q) You know how I know your gay A) Cuz your gay

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

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How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

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Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? hes all right now

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A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

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Racecar is spelled the same forwards and backwards. Masturbation does not work.

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Why do black people suck? Because they're black

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

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What's funny about cheese? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops