A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars. You both have the same amount of money.

What do an Eagle and a sugar cube have in common? The fact that if let to disintegrate they both turn slowly to hydrogen after a period of time.

What's weirder than an asian? His dinner

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana Your parents must have little regard for your social identity because they named you after a tropical fruit. Either that or you are clinically insane. I am concerned; please leave.

Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

Q: what's blue and kills you when it falls from the sky? A: a whale no shit

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

safety framed toilets like bbw (big black women)

wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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