Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

How do you get rid of black elephants? Arrest it for being black.

what is a mix of a bull dog and a shih tzu. a bread of dog that has a shaggy face and long hair

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

A man walks into a bar.

jibby jobby

why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

Why did princess diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing her seatbelt

Guest what in the butt

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

What is black and has no education A tire.

Good job, son.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

A person with OCD walked into a abr.

A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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