-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Dave. -Dave who? -Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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Q: what is funny today A: your parents died in a horrible car accident

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i have yougurt with tractor

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What would Jesus do? Something worthy of having him nailed to a cross.

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How do you stop a Polish army on horseback? With artillery.

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Why wasn't the black man allowed on the golf course? Because a wealthy business man had rented out the entire course for a very important international investor.

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Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

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Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

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Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

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roses are blue, violets are unicorns, this poem doesnt make any sense. refrigerator

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Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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yo mumma is so smelly i can distictly smell her more than her perfume

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Why do you put babies in the blender feet first? To hear them scream.

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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Excuses are like assholes: Gay men like to have sex with them.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

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What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

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Q: What do you call a black preist? A: Father

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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