How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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Sup homie G. Shutup you are not black.

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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why did the white man read the New York Times? because HuffPo is horrible. I mean, it's so so so shitty. it's like a wannabe buzzfeed, which ought to say it all.

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:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

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A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

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So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

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What does Snoop dog wash his clothes with Bleach

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(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

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Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

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your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

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what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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Q. What is a similarly between Jewa and Pizza. A. There both baked in a over

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Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

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Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

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What ticks like a clock and has numbers on it? A clock.

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A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion...

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How many mathematicians does it take to count?

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Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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