A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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what do you do when you see a priest in a bar? tell him that is un richeous and he shall pay for his sins right before you kill him

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

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Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

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Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

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What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

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What has two legs, and is red all over? Half a cat.

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What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower. A Mexican that is fresh out of college and does not yet own a lawnmower.

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knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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What do you call a blue and black dot on the wall? A fly wearing blue jeans.

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roses are cows violets are oranges im mental are you too

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

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what did the man say to the other man when he saw a dinosaur look.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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