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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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wanna hear a joke? me niether.

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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Title IX

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Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

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A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a motorcycle nothing, I dont have either

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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"You two form fours while I get the other one"

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. I don't know, I've had a bad day, I can't think straight. Why do you keep asking me these questions? Always talking at me, everyday it's the same - why can't you just shut up?! I would be better off dead, then it would stop, this suffocating blackness. I need to escape...I'm going to do it tonight...pills, something like that...I don't care any longer. Goodbye.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

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Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

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Why was little Tommy scared? Because he'd just been abducted by a psychopathic rapist.

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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