What did the tree say when it was cut down? Nothing, it's a tree

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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What do cows and grass have in common? They both say "moo", except for the grass.

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I once met with Mahatma Gandhi and he said to me "Child, why do I walk this earth?.. What is the meaning of my living?.. Why am I alive?" and I bowed in respect of his wisdom and said "I don't know. Why do you?" and he said "I don't I'm dead."

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car> "Get in the car."

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Me.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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whats the best joke ever? womens rights

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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Why did the blonde have the biggest tits in 3rd grade? She's 21

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What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

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what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Q: Why did the cheerleader drop her pom-poms? A: She was knocked unconscious from behind and repeatedly sodomized by a convicted rapist.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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