What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

What do you call a baked bean falling from 10,000 feet? A baked bean

A man walks into a convenient store and asks the cashier where the toilet paper is. She says aisle five. He goes down aisle five and there's no toilet paper.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

A man goes to a doctor and says , "My arm hurts in 3 places." the doctor says, "Dont go to those places.

What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

No soap radio

Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

1 out of 4 questions. How do you get a girrafe in a fridge? Open it, put the girrafe in, and close it.

A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

What is a vampire's favorite desert? Assuming they are real I dont think they would enjoy it in the daylight, so really there's no point.

Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

two parrots are seated on a perch. One turns to the other and says, "Do you smell fish?"

roses are red, violets are blue. Some poems don't make sense, Salad.

womens sports...

What did the farmer say when he lost his donkey? "Oh no, my donkey is my livelihood and the only means I have of supporting my family. Now, we shall surely starve."

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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