A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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Why was the anti-joke poster offended by all of the thumbs down? Because he didn't understand the concept of an anti-joke and instead submitted a childish, racist, incoherent lame 'joke'. This filled him with angst because he is uneducated and doesn't respond well to criticism.

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A little gir gets stung by a bee. Her parents see the bump She now geting meletedin Rehab because her parents saw her shoot up heroine.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

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bish bash bosh giz a nosh

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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one of my friends died of heartburn today :( i cant believe gav is gone

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Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

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What did the pepperoni say to the pepper We are both tacos

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What did the gay man do last night? Had a curry

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

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A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

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A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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