Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

What do you find in a pile of dead babies? ************************************************ A dead baby.

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

What did the brown guy say to the black person when he got fired? Nothing, did you think this was going to be racist or something?!

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? 17

What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

once upon a time, it snowed

What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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