Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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Why is it so bad that the bus fell off the cliff? All my friends were on it.

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How many immature teenagers does it take to change a light bulb? Ya mum.

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Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

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Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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Why does the man ignore his wife? Because he is dead.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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No one walks into a bar The bar is slowly losing business and will soon be forclosed upon and will also lose his home as a result causing his family and himself to be homeless and slowly suffer on the streets

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how many people were on the bus........ 0 cause the bus was parked for 45 years

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What is the Civil War called in Virginia? The War of Northern Aggression.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose... But that's disgusting.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had AIDS

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Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

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Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

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Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What's brown and sticky? A piece of toffee, which is brown and/or dark brown in color.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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