Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

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A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

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A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

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What is the different between going to church and reading a newspaper? You can take your shoes off when you read a newspaper.

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Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

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A: Knock knock B: Who is it? A: You'r wife. B: My wife? A: Yes! B: Ok, then i think i pass that question.

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

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A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

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Name two things that are stupid and can get stupider. You can't , there's only one a blonde

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who's a slut... you're mom

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What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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