Where did Susie go in the bombing? Nowhere. Susie is the bomber.

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

How is a hamster like a cigarette? They are harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

How do you kill a blonde? Pull the pin and throw it back...then proceed to paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

Q: What did the passengers think of thier Chineese bus driver? A: They were very pleased with the bus driver's service, for he was a very safe driver and got them to their destination on time.

Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? An Xbox 360.

Your mama is so fat she suffered from diabetes and died of heart failure .

What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

Why did the homeless man steal food from the local grocery store? He had not eaten in three days and was forced to steal or risk possible starvation.

A ginger rapping.

How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

An Italian man with a very thick accent decides to travel to America. On arriving, he decides to take a taxi and tour the nearby city. The man, feeling hungry after a while, chooses to stop at a bakery. Upon entering the bakery, the man walks up to the display of bread, and points at the loaves of bread he wanted, calling to the baker "I want 2 piece." The baker, not understanding the man's accent asks the man to repeat what he said. So the man repeats, "I want 2 piece, right here, right now." "Sure thing," the baker says, and gives the man the loaves of bread.

Why did the Liberal tell the truth? If one ever does we will have the answer.

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

how many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one................ standing on a pile of dead babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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