I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

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so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

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In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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Yo momma so ugly that she is unpleasant to look at

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This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, yes.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? because he wanted to go hunting.

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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