Why was the guy shot? He was a soldier in World War 2. Lots of people were shot.

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What's long and hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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NASCAR

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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A black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar they sit down and happily have a drink CHEESE ON TOAST

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What did the genie say to the frog? Go home.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

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Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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How do you tell the difference between a bomb and an Asian? One blows up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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