There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

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A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

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The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

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A sober Amy Winehouse

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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A kid has no friends.

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How do you get a black man to use a condom? You explain to him all the benefits of safe sex.

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What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

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What did the mexican do when 3 INS workers came to his house? He showed them his papers and it turns out he was a natural born US citizen. The mexican then proceeded to invite the INS into his home for a cup of coffee but they respectfully declined

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What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

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Two black guys walked into a bar. And they killed everybody.

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play including his 6 year old sister who has down syndrome.

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You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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