two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

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How come the bartender didnt let the black guys in the bar Because the bar was closed.noone was aloud in the bar

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Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

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Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Knock, Knock No one was home.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

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A black man hailed a taxi cab. He got in, and the taxi drove him to his destination for an appropriate fee.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

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Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

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What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

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ok last night i found a pic of romney saying "if i win the election 8 million people will have no job" then Obama says hey romney now that i won the election it would be 8 million and one stupid.

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What do a dog and a tree have in common? BARK!

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dick dick dick... frogs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops