A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

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Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

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Your mother is so fat she has trouble finding clothes in her size.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

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meh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens live on farms.

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Whats the difference between a Preius and a vagina? One's the possibly the greatest invention of all time and possibly the only hope for the future of man kind. The others a Preius.

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Well, this is fun.

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Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a tumor Doctors give it 6 weeks before I die...

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Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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A Jew, an Atheist, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They each drink a bottle, have a conversation, and leave.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

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Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

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What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it's in a chicken coop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops