A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

what do fish smoke? sea weed

If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

Seriously tho, too much sex? I need to know dog.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

Two gay men walked into a bar in a bigoted, small-minded town and were beaten to death with shoes.

What do you get if you put a horse in a blender? Dinner

Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

How do you kill yourself You jump of a cliff

What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

What's big, yellow and green? The sun, i was kidding about the green

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Death is inevitable.

Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

Y R U A B? I don't know why I am a bee.

Knock, Knock? Who's There? Not Suzie

dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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