So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

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10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Jonny Cash. Now we have?

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Why did Sidney drop her ice cream? A refrigerator fell on er

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What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

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RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

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What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

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What do you call A potato who is covered in red refrigerators and is known as a potato. Fallafal

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If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5... that's $10.

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God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

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Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust What's worse than the holocaust? Two worms in you apple what worse than 2 worms in your apple? Two holocausts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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