What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

Have you ever noticed how those little packets of sweetner are really handy to have around when you like your coffee to be sweeter than its default bitterness?

So a priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a black person walk into a bar. The Bar Tender says, "Is this some kind of joke"

Did you hear the one about the streetlight? It only came on at night.

what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

Where do the biggest potatoes grow? the ground.

What;s worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

Whats a Quires favorite type of sport?--- A contact sport

why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

Knock knock Go fuck yourself

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...