Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

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A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

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How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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Just happy you are back Nero, I have no idea what a proxy is but I am at my mum`s place, is everything alright between us now?

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Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

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this is not a drill.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? cause' he was annoyed with all the stereotypcial idiots who insist he crosses the road for comical value

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what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

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hi

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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Dead girls can't say no.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold climate. I guess this was just a waste of time.

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What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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Dad: "When I was your age, I had to walk outside to catch the school bus. If it snowed heavily the night before, school was canceled."

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on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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