the fat lady said that it runs in the family im pretty sure nothing RUNS in her family

Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

Why couldn't the emo kid finish reading his book? Because he was on the titanic when it sank.

In Soviet Russia my freedoms are severally restricted by communism.

I found someone on the ground who wasn't breathing and had no pulse.They must have been in a damn deep sleep.

Why wasn't the old woman sitting on the porch? Because she got raped by a big scorpian.

What's the difference between? Your mom.

A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

What happens when a Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. He gets a broken nose.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

Q: Why did the black man die poor? A: Because he was financially irresponsible and wasted the millions left to him by his father fueling his alcohol addiction, slowly grinding away at his organs until he died of cirrhosis of the liver.

An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

Why did the girl throw her watch out of the window? because her mind wasn't as intelligent as a normals person mind as she had mental problems.

what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

What a wonderful life!!! *gunshot*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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