One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

Teacher: What's 2x2 John? John: (ignores teacher) Teacher: John! John: huh? Teacher: go on John: uh? 24?

what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

Helena: Can u get me a pencil? Me: Sure. Me: Mr. Brandmeyer can u give me a pencil? Mr. Brandmeyer: Why? Me: I don't know. That's what Helena said.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

I like dogs. Lots of dogs. Meow.

what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

So i was writing a letter to my girlfriend on valentines day right ? So this is how it goes . " hey lisa happy volentines day!" my black friend walks up to me and says" its a mightyfine day out! " The moral of the story is... Tomatoes can't fly planes

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

Why did the police officer pull over a black guy? He was going over the appropriate speed limit for that area.

Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he'd would like to make a wager. The bartender replies, "no."

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

Q: What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A: A pilot you racist.

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...