What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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What happened to the cow that couldn't moo? It died because it could not make it's needs known to it's fellow herd and was bullied and isolated.

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How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

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Black people

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

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Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

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A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

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What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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A: What do you call a Jew with only one arm on Christmas? B: An amputee.

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Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

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Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

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How much did the Holla Cost?

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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