What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

An Irish man walked into a bar. He turned to the bartender and said hello. Then walked to the back booth for his lunch meeting with the heads of his highly profitable company and then went home.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, although depending on how high the light in question is and where it's located she may need someone to help hold a ladder for her, if it's particularly unsteady.

Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

* anti-punchline

Why does Michael Jackson have difficulty playing chess? Because he's dead, and if there is an afterlife, we don't actually have the ability to know that it is possible to play chess there.

james hedge is gay did you know if you look at him you turn gay

Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

eh dylan quieres que te trolle de nuevo

Q: How do you make a clown frown? A: Hit it with an ax.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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