A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the cab driver say to the black man when he got into his cab? Where to, sir?

thumb_up thumb_down +1,290

Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man hits a woman while driving. Whose fault is it? The mas. He was out drinking that night and shouldn't have gotten in his car in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

smell the vitamin C

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: How many Jews can you fit in a 4-seater car? A: 4

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

I leave you with a riddle, I am round. I am an orange. What am I?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the tree say to himself? Gee-oma-tree( get it geometry say it outloud)

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If 1 + 2 = 3 Then, what does 2 + 1 equal? It equals 3 due to the fact that reversing the order of numbers does not change the outcome of the equation :D

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops