Did you hear about the Nun in the Twin Towers? Yeah, she died too

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

Why did the boy eat the worm? Because his parents were starving him, and it was all he had.

the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

How are friends and trees alike? They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

Why did the black man cross the road? Black people don't exist.

what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

what does an Ethiopian man say to greet a Chinese man well, first they must locate a translator fluent in both said languages, but they would most likely say hello

Women's rights

How many black guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None can, since noone can work together because they cant see eachother.

An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

Cliterus

Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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