Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and oranges? With one,you can make a delicous smoothie, but the other is just a pile of citrus fruits.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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a black guy and a hispanic are in a car. Whos driveing? The bvlack guys mom, picking them up from a church class, and takeing them to volunteer a the local homeless shelter.

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

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She said no

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

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What's the opposite of Them Cox? Deez Nuts

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the farmer let him out, and he found a road to cross!

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What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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A flight attendant walks up to a black man on a plane. She then asks if he would like anything to drink.

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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shut up iggy

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whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

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What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

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Hey guess what an antijoke is. What? a joke Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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